Under Consideration

Under consideration is a relationship stage in which someone is evaluating a potential relationship or dynamic with another person before committing. The term is often used in BDSM or power exchange relationships to describe a trial phase where both people can explore whether they're a good fit. It’s often used as a way to slow things down and make sure consent, expectations, and compatibility are clear before committing to a more structured or long-term dynamic. Under consideration does not specify the seriousness or what kind of relationship is being considered. It could be monogamous or polyamorous. It could be a switch dynamic, a lifelong 24/7 power exchange relationship, a short period of servitude, or a scene-based dynamic. In more structured power exchange dynamics (such as D/s or M/s), an under consideration period is often treated as an ethical step before committing to deeper authority or long-term roles. Under consideration is generally: - A low-risk trial period: Under consideration is often a “no-fault” arrangement where either person can end things at any time without hard feelings. - A way to test compatibility: It lets partners see if their styles of dominance, submission, and needs actually work together in practice. - A foundation-building phase: During this phase, people may start building key elements of a dynamic like trust, communication, respect, honesty, and understanding. - Clarifying consent: Taking time helps distinguish genuine, informed consent from excitement, fantasy, or “new relationship energy.” It helps ensure people don't agree to things they wouldn’t choose long-term. - Flexible structure: There are no fixed rules. Partners decide together what to include, such as rules, protocols, scenes, or just ongoing negotiation. - Gradual progression: Dynamics often develop in stages. Rules, expectations, or power exchange may be introduced slowly rather than all at once. - No set timeline: It can last as long as everyone involved agrees. - Easy exit: Anyone can end the under consideration period at any time, ideally with clear communication and respect. Ending it doesn’t mean anyone failed. It just means the fit wasn’t right. - Safety and clarity benefits: It helps people avoid jumping into a full dynamic too quickly and gives them a safe way to assess whether the relationship works for them. - More than just kink compatibility: It’s a chance to see how you align on communication, boundaries, conflict, schedules, life goals, and emotional needs—not just shared interests or attraction. Sometimes a "consideration collar" is used in BDSM relationships during a trial or early commitment phase. It signals intention or exclusivity while the dynamic is still being explored. It is generally less binding than a permanent collar, which may represent long-term commitment or ownership.