boi

Boi is a term used in lesbian, queer, and BDSM communities to describe someone—often masculine-presenting, a feminized male submissive, or nonbinary—who embodies a youthful, soft, or androgynous form of masculinity. The spelling with an “i” distinguishes it from boy, signaling a more fluid, queer, or subversive expression of gender. ### Community Variations of Boi Because boi spans multiple queer and kink cultures, it carries different meanings depending on context. ### Non-binary and Genderqueer Communities Many NB and genderfluid people use boi to mean: - Masculine, but not male. - Boyish, soft, or androgynous masculinity. - A queer identity that doesn’t align with traditional “manhood.” This is one of the most common modern uses. ### Butch/Femme & Lesbian Communities Boi has long been used to describe: - A younger butch. - A boyish lesbian. - A genderqueer or masculine-presenting lesbian or queer woman. This usage is not inherently submissive. ### Gay Male, Leather, and Kink Communities In these spaces, boi can refer to: - A submissive man. - A twinky or boyish bottom. - Someone who presents a youthful or soft-edged masculinity. - A kink role adjacent to “boy,” but queerer and more fluid. ### Origins of the Term While “boi” is widely used today across many genders, races, and queer identities, the term does have important origins in queer communities of color, particularly among masculine-presenting women of color. In the early 2000s, boi became a common self-identifier for: - Young butch lesbians. - Gender-nonconforming queer women. - Masculine queer women of color. Discussions on Autostraddle, Slate, and other publications highlight how boi emerged as a response to narrow white-centered definitions of butch/femme. This history overlaps with, stud, a Black-specific identity for masculine lesbians. It emerged in the 1960s as a response to the exclusion of Black lesbians from mainstream lesbian feminism, which was largely centered on white women. Stud is not interchangeable with "butch," as it is an exclusive identity meant only for Black people and is considered a distinct label from butch and other gender expressions. There has been significant backlash against white lesbians who adopt the term, with critics emphasizing that it is a cultural identity rooted in Black queer history and should not be appropriated. While both "boi" and "stud" can describe masculine-presenting queer women of color, "stud" is specifically tied to Black identity, whereas "boi" is used more broadly across different racial and ethnic backgrounds within the LGBTQIA+ community. The terms are sometimes used in tandem, with "soft stud" referring to a more feminine-presenting lesbian who still identifies as masculine in some aspects, often preferring to date femmes or other studs. ### Related Roles - boy - girl